SIGH

Dear Qantas,

I am writing this to fill in some time while I am on hold for your 'Found Services' department in Melbourne.

'Welcome to Qantas found property, Melbourne Airport. This office is open Monday to Friday.9:30am to 2:30pm and is closed weekends and Public Holidays. If you have left personal items on a Qantas aircraft or in a Qantas terminal, and are calling within these hours please stay on the line and your call will be answered in turn.'

I have learnt that off-by-heart because I have heard it every 2 minutes for the last 53 minutes.

I left my iPhone in the Qantas Club lounge last week. (The lounge dedicated to customers that are loyal to Qantas, you know the one?) When I landed in Brisbane I tried to check if it was picked up but of course 'This office is open Monday to Friday, 9:30am to 2:30pm and is closed weekends and public holidays' so I've had to wait 3 days to check.

oh! they are playing it again!:
'Welcome to Qantas found property, Melbourne Airport. This office is open Monday to Friday.9:30am to 2:30pm and is closed weekends and Public Holidays. If have left personal items on a Qantas aircraft or in a Qantas terminal, and are calling within these hours please stay on the line and your call will be answered in turn.'

Whilst I appreciate that I am a stupid dope for leaving my iPhone behind, I find your reaction quite puzzling. I have been assured by Qantas staff in Brisbane that if you find my phone, and if you bother opening the office and answering the phone to tell me, that you won't put it on one of the many planes you have flying to Brisbane and that I will have to send a courier. Because actually putting effort into

Oh it's playing again!
'Welcome to Qantas found property, Melbourne Airport. This office is open Monday to Friday.9:30am to 2:30pm and is closed weekends and Public Holidays. If you have left personal items on a Qantas aircraft or in a Qantas terminal, and are calling within these hours please stay on the line and your call will be answered in turn.'

as I was saying. Actually putting effort into helping a customer out in a time of a need would be too much to ask.

I sincerely hope you haven't sold my iPhone on Ebay and used the money to buy some new oxygen tanks.

Also, while I am here. You need to re-fill the cake tins at the qantas club more regularly. I like cake.

-Josh Thomas

And again!
'Welcome to Qantas found property, Melbourne Airport. This office is open Monday to Friday.9:30am to 2:30pm and is closed weekends and Public Holidays. If you have left personal items on a Qantas aircraft or in a Qantas terminal, and are calling within these hours please stay on the line and your call will be answered in turn.'

It's been 65 minutes now